Friday, February 24, 2012
Role play has always fascinated me. I love stories from couples who have lost themselves to their fantasy worlds, time and time again changing their roles to suit a new idea, fetish or theme. I also love the idea of participating in a myriad collection of my own fantasies. I want to lose myself the same way and experiment with every deviant little flutter of my lustful heart: but damn if it's not the hardest thing for me to do.
I write fiction, I love to take erotic photographs, I craft worlds and I fantasize constantly about things both real and imagined. I explore erotica and study the art of seduction and I share my obsession with the world. But I cant seem to pretend for an hour I'm a school teacher or a businessman attending an out of town conference looking to hook up with a married woman in a bar. I've tried planning out a scenario, I've tried spontaneity, I've tried the silent approach where all I had to do was pretend I was a Dom who expected only eager submission from my 'call girl'. Really, it doesn't get any easier than to pretend than that! Yet each time I stare down the lion in my mind I get the same knots in my stomach and the inescapable feeling that I'm acting like a complete idiot.
That being said, I won't give up. Call me stubborn, stupid, or determined: it doesn't matter. I will continue to try Roleplay. Eventually I think I'll be able to crack my iron walls and set my fantasies free. I'll be the fireman, the construction worker on a service call, the businessman, or the rockstar backstage with a groupie. The fool inside me is defiant and armored against rolling eyes and gentle shakes of the head. Get ready ladies; it's time to save the horse and ride a cowboy!